So I've been feeling sorry for myself lately. I dont know why. I mean I suppose I do. Its a mixture of having no job, no degree, not going to school, and feeling like I want to start a family but we're just not ready for it yet. I've been feeling really down for a couple weeks now and I've been trying to figure out a way to stop eating bag after bag of cheetos, wanting to vomit, and then feeling worse. Yesterday I decided me n Greg were really going to hit the gym. If I could do the werewolf workout for a month, and not see any results, then I would consider taking out the implant (birth control) as the problem. I will not blame it for my depression, or my lack of motivation. I'm not looking for a scape goat. Just understanding.
Yesterday we hit the gym for the first time in weeks. It was a rough workout but it felt amazing. Now today he has a night flight, which always makes working out hard because we either have to go before his flight which makes him exhausted the rest of the day, or wait until 3am to go. Well i'm determined to go tonight. Even just for a half hour. Just to prove we aren't giving up.
Back to my funk. I need to snap out of it. While i was home I watched Eat, Pray, Love one night while i was feeling sorry for myself for missing my husband. A great movie to watch if you're depressed. Because its not a love story, I mean it is, but thats not all it is. So today I decided I'd finally read the book. Its been sitting on my nook for months and I need something uplifting. Even just the first 100 pages (theres about 600 on the nook) were so helpful. I put on some soothing music, and did yoga for a half hour. I cant tell you the last time I did yoga like that. No book, no movie, just doing the moves i remembered as being the most stress relieving. Its such a mood lifter. I feel so great after actually doing something other than sitting around all night watching tv and eating. I've read, I've cleaned, even did the laundry, AND i did yoga. Ten points on my self esteem roster. :)
So if you're looking for a good book to read, Eat Pray Love. If you want to feel better about yourself, do yoga (and avoid mc donalds for a week, I promise it helps) Love to all who support me. <3
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